Disneyland 2015 Countdown: Day 72

This week, I'm counting down to Disneyland 2015 with memories and anticipation of Adventureland. Today, we're visiting The Jungle Cruise.

I don't remember the Jungle Cruise from 1997. I do, however, remember our visit in 2007. Here’s a rough approximation of how it went:

(Family boards the boat, named something clever like Candy Cane Connie, because it was Christmas.) Hey folks, welcome to The Jungle Cruise- I’ll be your stripper- I mean skipper- today! So, how many of you are riding the Jungle Cruise for the first time? Great so am I! (Family laughs politely.) Let's take a quick poll here. Raise your hand if you were born on your birthday! (Cassandra laughs audibly in the awkward silence of the other passengers, and the skipper gets an evil glint in his eye.)  Okay, well, great! Now hold on to those hats and glasses folks. Cause this here is the WILDEST RIDE IN THE WILDERNESS! (Wait…that’s a joke! Cassandra laughs harder and the family prepares for the worst.) Over there is what we call the Indiana Jones Adventure and the Temple of the Four-Hour Line. (Truth in advertising! Cassandra collapses against her sister, overcome with laughter. Encouraged, the skipper begins targeting puns directly at Cassandra’s family.)  And now, we're approaching the beautiful Schweitzer Falls, named after that famous African explorer, Dr. Albert Falls. (It’s funny because his last name is Schweitzer! Also, because its a waterfall! Now other people on the boat are staring uncomfortably at Cassandra.) This is the backside of Schweitzer Falls, which is a little something I like to call…O-2-H. (Cassandra laughs so hard she falls out of the boat.) Well folks, that concludes our tour! As we approach, please notice that there's a dock on the left, and a dock on the right.  But don't let it confuse you.  It's a paradox. (Cassandra, now back in the boat, continues to laugh in a sopping wet heap on the floor. Other passengers disembark, thankful to be away from that crazypants.) 

The Jungle Cruise, to me, is the perfect example of how Disneyland rolls with the punches, and keeps being amazing. One of the original attractions present at the Disneyland Grand Opening, the ride was initially intended to be educational and informative. The animatronics were installed after zoologists convinced Walt Disney that real animals were a bad idea. (Too bad they missed that memo for Animal Kingdom, and I right?? Anybody?) Anyway. The ride was quickly outdated and surpassed by other higher-tech rides with more flash and appeal. So, rather than removing one of the staples of the park’s history, Disneyland rolled with the punches, and turned the ride into a pun-infested laugh fest, poking fun at themselves.  The ride is one of the few places where cast members break the wall, and acknowledge events from outside Adventureland and poke fun at the Disney Company itself.  It is on my Top Ten Favorite Rides EVER list and definitely a must-hit for 2015.